Ocho Broko

Welcome back friends! I'm sorry to have been gone for so long, but I have been on a month long sabbatical searching for the illusive Gil Duff in all pubs and port-a-potties in Deer Park, OH. It has been all quiet on the mid-western front...until yesterday that is, when Hamilton County Auditor, aka the American Dream, Dusty Rhodes sent Chad a some hate mail. Per the Cincinnati Enquirer, "Johnson owes a total of $13,063.35 in back taxes. Of that, (ONLY) $12,780.30 is delinquent." So let me get this straight, since 2004 when he bought his Walnut Hills condo, Johnson has earned $10.85 million and overlooked paying $13,063.35 in property taxes? I mean I don't enjoy paying taxes just as much as anybody else, but I pay them. I mean WOW, what a bum! So not only is he a disgruntled baby, but he is also a terrible citizen! Hey Chad, I know you're reading this, maybe you should put down the McDonald's Big Breakfast and stick with the dollar menu buddy. You know how they say hindsight is 20/20, guess you should've escrowed those taxes Ocho. What an atrocious human being! I broke the story on the Paul Daugherty show May 5th, and now this is just breaking. Just wait til you hear what's next for Ocho. Stay tuned for breaking hobo news. As always, Ocho Broko, you are NOT a Great American!

The Great Gil Duff

I want to break away from the Chad Johnson saga for a day and speak on a subject that I am very passionate about: Gil Duff! To those who have been hiding under a rock for the past nine days, Gil Duff is now infamous "Drunken Deer Park Toilet Snoozer." In the wee hours on Thursday morning Gil Duff was found napping on the john at Chamerlain Park with a 40 oz. of malt liquor stuffed in his pocket. The funny thing is that ol' Gil doesn't head to the lavatory for the normal reasons of relieving yourself, he goes to catch some z's. This marks the third arrest for publicly napping under the influence in the past nine days. The previous two offenses occurred across from the former site of PlainStock, at Bechtold Park, right in the heart of Deer Park. Gil plead guilty to a "minor misdemeanor of passing out drunk on a portable toilet." When questioned by Hamilton County Municipal Judge David Stockdale, Duff replied, "Yes, sir. Guilty sir." Judge Stockdale ordered ol' Gil to pay only pay court costs, so you know he will back at a port-a-potty passed out this weekend. I am told as Duff exited the courtroom he said only two words, "thank God." Yes Gil, thank God for you! You are quickly climbing the charts in Deer Park and surrounding Cincinnati neighborhoods as a legend! I urge you to continue your passion and lifelong goal of painting every Cincinnati area park DUFF! To Gil, if you're reading this, French Park has yet to be Duffed, it has been a long week and the weekend is here. Time to blow off some steam and relax on your portable throne. Of course, if you carry any anti-French sentiment, there's always Reading!

Best of luck Gil, You are a Great American!

Chad Johnson Jersey Worth Cyclones Ticket

Never in a million years would I have imagined that a #85 Chad Johnson jersey was worth as much as a Cincinnati Cyclones ticket. WGRR (Oldies 103.5FM) is hosted what they call an “85 Trade Off” Tuesday, April 29 at the Koch’s Sporting Goods Store on Fourth Street in downtown Cincinnati. Swapping your now defunct Bengals jersey yielded two tickets to the Cyclones playoff game. Now if that isn’t a slap in the face, I don’t know what is. The forgotten jerseys will be donated to charity, so if you see a ‘homeless’ guy with a “will work for food” sign, sporting a rather new Chad Johnson Bengals jersey, don’t spit in his face and tell him to get a life, because he may actually be homeless.

I want to thank the Sendyourjerseybacktochad.com bloggers for tuning in both Sunday and Monday evening. I am working on attaching the podcast with Paul Daugherty from Monday evening’s ‘Sports Talk with Doc’ radio show. I will keep you posted on that. It’s hump day, so get through today and we’re almost home. Stay classy Cincinnati and never forget, You are a Great American.

The Aftermath

First of all, I just want to thank Ken Broo for having me on Sunday Morning Sports Talk and everyone who listened to our radio interview Sunday morning. From what I am told, I think it went quite well. In fact, I am guessing it went so well that I will be returning to the airwaves of 700WLW AM this evening around 6:30PM EST for Sports Talk with Paul Daugherty. So if you missed yesterday's program, do whatever you can to ensure that you do not miss greatness twice!

This past weekend was the annual NFL Draft and after weeks of speculation that Chad would be traded on Draft Day has come and gone, I am not happy! How does forcing someone into something that they don't want to do help any party? Oh that's right, it doesn't. Regardless, the reports of financial troubles may force #85 into camp and onto the playing field sooner, rather than later. To that, I say, do not, please, do not show up. I saw a note that the Hyde Park McDonald's is hiring! I am sure they would give Chad the benefit of the doubt and give him a chance to prove himself at the fryer caddy. "Chad, may I have a few more packets of ketchup please?!?"

Grading the Beengals draft. The national media has graded as high as a B, from John Czarnecki of Fox Sports, C+ from ESPN's Mel Kiper, all the way to a D- from Jason Cole of Yahoo! Sports. Honestly though, what do they know? Generally, it takes 2 years to truthfully grade a draft, so regardless of what anyone says now, it means next to nothing. Then again, I can still give my two cents. The Beengals bounced back from Saturday's shocking move not to trade up for Sedrick Ellis and their 2nd round pick of Jerome Simpson, who may very well become an elite receiver in this league. Anyone with Carson Palmer at QB and lining up opposite TJ Houshmanzadeh, has an opportunity to really be a difference maker. I love the Beengals 3rd round selections of Pat Sims (6-2, 310 pound DT out of Auburn) and Andre Caldwell (6-1, 200 pound WR from Florida. Friday begins the weekend's mandatory rookie mini-camp, so I look forward to those reports.

Again, please tune in this evening to 700WLW AM for the Paul Daugherty hosted "Sports Talk wit Doc" show. I will be phoning in around the 6:30PM EST timeframe. We are really growing baby, so thank you for your help and never forget, You are a Great American!

Draft Day (Update)

So I am going out on a limb here, and say this has to be the WORST draft day ever! I do not hate on the Beengals for taking Rivers with their first pick, but when Sweed and Malcolm Kelly are still on the board and you take an unkown Coastal Carolina wideout named Jerome Simpson I am dumbfounded. I hope to be proven wrong in nine months! In other news, I am hearing that Levi Jones just demanded a trade. Good thing the Beengals resigned him last year. I am speechless.

Regardless, make sure to tune into to 700WLW tomorrow morning between the 11:20-11:30 AM timeframe to hear the greatness that is Ken Broo and yours truly. Until tomorrow my friends, its Saturday night...be a Great American!

Draft Day

The day has finally come. The day that gives fans of every team a glimmer of hope for the future of their organization. The Beengals, like every team have holes to fill through the Draft, but the Beengals problem is they have more holes than a slice of Swiss cheese! Defense especially. I mean my goodness; defensive line, defensive end, linebacker, safety, coaching, etc. With the ninth selection in the 2008 NFL Draft I pray that USC DT Sedrick Ellis is available. More than likely, though, he will not. If not, I do like his teammate Keith Rivers LB from USC. Of course, there is always the chance that Mike Brown and family blow another chance to improve their team. Actually, there is a great chance of that happening!

Anyhow, since you are blogging on sendyourjerseybacktochad.com we will focus on how we can rid ourselves of the migraine that is Chad Johnson. If any team offers 2 first-round picks for #85, Mike Brown better take it! I have had enough of this hard guy stance that they are taking. He wants out, get him out. I don’t care if there is an $8 million cap hit, how does proving a point help the team? Eventually you will have to dump him and why not do it when he is worth the most? Just another example of why Mike Brown would be bankrupt as a head of any other company.

There is a decent crop of wideouts in this years draft and if the Beengals have the opportunity to select the 6’3” Limas Sweed from Texas or possible CJ replacement Mario Manningham in the second round, they need to take them. Think about it, right now the Beengals have Tooraj Houshmanzadeh as their number one receiver, and then who, Glenn Holt, Antonio Chapman or Doug Gabriel? Who is the world is Doug Gabriel anyway? I also like a second day selection of Adrian Arrington from Michigan. He had a remarkable catch against Florida in the Gator Bowl. Of course, he also has a domestic violence case on his record, but what wide receiver doesn’t these days? And for Manningham, he scored a 6 on his Wonderlic test! If Limas Sweed is ripe for the taking after the #9 pick, and the Beengals can make some type of move, with 9 picks in this years draft, you have to snag this guy. He is the real deal!

I will be blogging on-the-go throughout the Draft today from Reading, Ohio, so check back in for updates! As always, You are a Great American!

*****BREAKING NEWS*****

Sendyourjerseybacktochad.com has had a heck of an opening week. From the Jim Scott Morning Show on 700WLW, "childish" comments from Mo Egger, SportsTalk with Paul Daugherty last night, The Two Angry Guys on 96.5 FM, and now I am proud to introduce the first radio interview! Set the alarm and gather your family, Sunday Morning SportsTalk with the great Ken Broo is tentatively scheduled for Sunday morning April 27th, 2008 at 11:20AM on 700WLW. Ken Broo is known in many circles as The premier tri-state talk show host, and I couldn't be happier than to sit and chat with a fellow Ohio Bobcat! This is truly an honor and I am excited for my second stint on the Nation's Station. While we are on the topic, I am going for broke on the interview and need three fantastic one-liners, so I am asking you, my sendyourjerseybacktochad.com faithful to provide me with your best one-liner and the top three will make it on the air. That is my challenge to you. Are you clever enough?

Also, I am now told from many that Chad Johnson has attached our link on his own MySpace page. I would check myself, but I don't have an account with that website. I personally have a Facebook account, and refuse to join both. To those bloggers with a Facebook AND a MySpace account, I say get a life! I'm sorry, someone had to say it. Anyhow, if anyone can confirm this, please email me a screenshot. To be honest with you, I'm not sure how to take this. I guess Ocho is embracing his new found "stardom." So, Chad this is for you, quit crying on ESPN and go play football! I saw your interview last night and I swear I saw a tear. You are an emotional guy, it's ok, embrace your femininity.

That's it for this Friday, make sure to check back in Saturday morning for The pre-draft blog on the web. Thanks again and rememer, You are a Great American!

Thursday Thoughts

I apologize to all my sendyourjerseytochad.com faithful for the lack of an update yesterday, my blog-machine crashed and burned! Don't worry, I'm back with a new Dell! Anyhow, let’s get down to business. This is the very first in a millennium of Thursday Thoughts. Basically, its Thursday and I have some Thoughts that I need to air out. It’s that easy. Wish me luck.

*The Beengals passed on the Chad Johnson trade the Washington Redskins for a first-rounder at Saturday's NFL Draft and a conditional third-round pick, which could become a first-round pick if Chad Johnson hit certain elevators. Why does everyone in the media assume this would have been a first round pick in the 2009 NFL Draft? ESPN's Chris Mortensen reports that he would have to catch 90 balls in order for that to happen. Ninety receptions from Jason Campbell? He didn't even have 90 receptions with Carson Palmer as his quarterback last season!

*Dear Cry Baby, the grass doesn't get much greener than Carson Palmer. I would love to get 85 ostracized in Oakland trying to catch fluttered balls from JaMarcus Russell, mad in Miami with Cleo Lemon or crying in Chicago with Rex Grossman.

*Marvin Lewis thinks that Chad will be a "man of his word" and not play? Man of his word huh? Literally two years ago this month, that bum signed a six-year $35.5 million dollar contract. Now I'm not a Drew Rosenhaus, but isn't a signed legal binding contract an extension of your word?

*The more reports I hear get botched from the Cincinnati Beengal organization, the more I think that in any other industry Mike Brown would have gone bankrupt over a decade ago.

That's it for today. I have received hundreds of emails from sendyourjerseybacktochad.com bloggers who have already sent their jersey's to Chad's condo. We have reached both 700WLW and 1530 Homer the Sports Animal. The goal is ESPN, so keep forwarding the website and more importantly the idea...remember, YOU are a Great American!

Happy Earth Day

On this Earth Day 2008, SendYourJerseyBacktoChad.com wanted to do their part in the form of a public service announcement. Insead of burning your Chad Johnson jerseys and emitting toxic gases into the stratosphere, simply send it to Ocho Cinco's house at the address below and let him deal with it. I mean heck, its his fault anyway right?!? Please stay tuned for more green ideas from SendYourJerseyBacktoChad.com

Welcome to sendyourjerseybacktochad.com

Chad Johnson wants out of Cincinnati. If you were a once proud owner of a Chad Johnson #85 jersey, it is your duty to let him know that he is no longer welcome in The Jungle. Effective immediately, all Chad jersey owners are shipping their unwanted threads back to The Crybaby. Please send those rat garments back to its rightful owner, Ocho Stinko, at his downtown Cincinnati palatial estate. Considering CJ was among the league leaders the past several seasons in jersey sales Bengals Nation should be able to jam up his mailbox. Do what Mikey Brown is not man enough to do himself, and erase 85 from your closet/life.

Please send said packages or hand deliver to:

Chad Johnson
919 Sharkey Lane
Cincinnati, OH 45206

As Willie would say, You are a great American.


PICS & VIDEO
Record your ugly divorce to Chad with pictures or video of yourself at the Post Office or on his doorstep and send them to NAFangmann@gmail.com Do us a favor and please, keep it Christian.